I spent this morning looking through old journals of the past year and rejoicing at how the Lord truly does everything for our good (Jeremiah 29:11-12). My journey to the place I am right now (less than two away from getting on a plane and flying to Kandaria, Kenya) began in January 2010 when I learned a lesson about the freedom and the blessings that come with obedience to God.
Reluctantly, tearfully and fearfully, I said “yes” to work at Camp WinShape for 10 weeks last summer. Ask anyone in my family: I am a homebody, and I love my comfort bubble that has all of my dear friends from high school and my incredible family. I cried for months (literally months) before going to college, and I cried when I realized what it would mean to be gone for the whole summer after my first year of college. Little did I know that this small step of obedience would bring me into one the biggest seasons of growth in the Lord- filled with many trials but also filled with more joy, peace, and love than I’ve ever experienced! After that summer, there is no way I could ever imagine not following every step of the Lord’s direction. How could I ever think about trying to follow my own path when I’ve experienced true joy and complete freedom in His plans?!... this is the reason that I am now going to Kenya in a month. The Lord opened up the doors, and I’m just following Him. I had been praying about this summer 2011 since camp ended last summer. Slowly my mind started thinking about going abroad, and my heart started desiring getting out of my American comfort bubble. I am studying nursing at USC, and so I thought it would be awesome to be able to do something in the medical field, but I had no idea if that was possible. I just kept praying and asking God to unite my heart and mind with His because I feared getting caught up in my own plans. Some doors shut and other doors opened with Mt. Bethel’s young adult internship program in Kenya. Two other girls and I will be staying with Missionary David Okongo and his family. David's a doctor and runs a clinic in his town. From what I've heard, he's an incredible teacher and an inspiring man of God! I'll get to work in the clinic and learn all that David has to teach me! It's incredible opportunity that’s directly from our God! I could have never planned such a trip!
The only way I know to prepare for this trip is prayer, prayer, prayer!!! I’ve enjoyed looking up the needs, prayer requests and praises of growth in Kenya through Operation World. One night I was so excited for the trip that I spent all night trying to learn Swahili (I don’t know if the websites online were the most accurate), but I couldn’t contain my excitement!
Raising support money for the trip has been a new challenge that comes with many new lessons. I’m having to trusting in Him in a way I have never had to before, and I’ve been humbled by asking the question that for so long I thought was the most awkward and uncomfortable question to ask: “Can you support me financially on my trip to Kenya even when I know you might be tight on your own budget?” But I’m learning what it means to be apart of living out Acts 2:42-47, and praise God that He is bigger than any amount of money!
When I am thinking and praying about this trip, I am not fearful of my safety. I am not worried about getting Malaria or any other disease. I’m not even concerned about being gone from my family and friends for 7 weeks (although, I’m sure I’ll still shed a few tears the night before I leave). But my biggest concern is how I will respond to all that I see and hear. How I will react to seeing more death and disease than I’ve probably seen in my lifetime? How I will respond to the reality that I can’t cure every person I meet, and that I can’t change corrupt governments or get rid of all the poverty? My hope is that I will not react out of the flesh when I face these tragedies. I pray that my initial reaction is to trust God in everything: to not let my frustrations and sadness buildup, but to turn them into prayers. My flesh is weak, my faith seems so small, and my view is so narrow. Thank goodness my God strong, He freely gives more faith when we ask, and His ways are higher than my ways!
13 days and counting!! Join me in praying for this trip- for Emily, Shelley and I (the girls I’ll be traveling with and living with). Please pray that we continue to die to ourselves daily (to our expectations of how the trip will go, our small view of God’s power, our small faith) and that we will walk united with Him and Him alone!
“Teach me your way, O Lord
that I may walk in your truth;
unite my heart to fear your name.
I give thanks to you, O Lord my God,
with my whole heart,
and I will glorify your name forever.”
–Psalm 86:11-12
